Take that leap

Lessons on standing still when all you want to do is jump into the unknown

Wanderer above the Sea of Fog by Caspar David Friedrich (1818)

Dear Reader,

It is an inevitable part of life to outgrow things: relationships, jobs, situations. And we know it by the friction: we can no longer breathe in here, we do not fit; it is too tight, too small.

It feels like we have remained in this place for too long. We have overstayed our welcome. In the beginning, we played by the book. We propelled forward, gaining experience. When trouble started, we did not back down. We repeatedly reminded ourselves that trials and tribulations are inextricably woven into the fabric of life. We received warning signs with a dash of salt… and denial. So we pushed and carried on, and tried and won. And then lost, only to win again. This carousel of emotions kept us alive for a while. When the dark clouds gathered, we refused to see them as the wake-up calls that they were. Instead, we insisted and fought blindly, ignorant of the impending waves crashing on the shores of our imaginary happiness.

And just as we thought we would sustain the growing prison, and that the worst was behind us, a realization hit us: the only way forward is by getting out.

Trepidation

When caught between a rock and a hard place, feeling lost is only natural. Staying is impossible. Leaving, on the other hand, is dreadful. Paralyzing fear obstructs any movement, yet inaction is not an option either.

We go through life’s adventures to learn and grow. But what if we outgrow them? Do we delude ourselves into staying despite the discomfort, or do we stare the truth in the eye? Do we keep paddling amidst soul-wrenching circumstances or do we just plunge into the unknown?

After all, how many times have we already heard the siren’s call in our heads, “Go for it! What are you waiting for? Life is Short!”

Indeed, such agonizing decisions are also imperative because we are the sole responsible agents of our lives. In the end, who will take care of us when we have lost ourselves by remaining in draining, heart-wrecking situations? Who will save us if we have no one to blame but ourselves for our inertia and cowardice?

Daring to be brave

We have done our calculations and drafted our pros and cons lists, but something still does not add up. It is the extra pain in the chest that cannot be outweighed. How do we muster the courage to leap forward, though? The future looks scary, unstable, and, yet, exciting.

Safety and courage are the polar opposites and we are seesawing between them. But to avoid regrets, we need to follow our gut and make bold decisions—not the irresponsible kind, but those that build up inside until they manifest as choices that might outwardly seem like a surprise but, in reality, have been a long time coming.

Odysseus Elytis once wrote, Take a leap faster than decay. So, let’s abandon the sinking ship before we are dragged into the abyss along with it.

Thank you for reading,

Katerina